Its true, I’ve lost it, my groove, myself. Among the binkies and dishes, I have no idea where it went. In between hostage situations staged by my two year old, I am so tired, I can’t remember if I ever had it. So, here is my very public attempt to find it, rebuild it, like it, own it and work it.
And tonight it started with swimming. I got back into the pool and just started doing laps. I was almost certain that my ass had become so large with the birth of my mini human #2 that the rear end of my bathing suit was transparent. At least there wasn’t anyone else in my lap lane (and at least it was impossible for me to look at my own ass without a mirror.)
Swimming was a large part of my life as a young person. It can be competitive but each time I have gotten into the pool and done laps, it has been more therapeutic. It’s quiet. It’s rhythmic. I can challenge myself. I have choices. I have control over my body, my breathing, my distance or my intensity.
It finally felt like a reset. Exhale.